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Now, that sounds mighty arrogant of me, doesn’t it?

I had someone equate missing me to withdrawing from a drug. Ignoring that the title sounds real conceited, it was funny to me. I wasn’t joking in my last post when I said it baffles me that people miss me. There are moments were I feel unbelievably forgettable, like no part of my existence is memorable. That makes my friends’ (it was multiple people who said this to me) comments all the more intriguing.

Deep down inside, I want to know I’m missed. I want to know that people think about me when I’m not around and want to be with me. There’s something about that I find appealing. To know that I’ve occupied someone’s thoughts enough that they have to text me or call me because they haven’t seen me in a while. It doesn’t stroke my ego, but it makes me feel wanted. I almost feel dirty confessing to that.

You know, I think I know why it baffles me though. It’s amazing to know that people miss me and think about me because there are times where I’m not necessarily thinking about other people (okay, now I really sound arrogant). I’m not very people centered, my personality type is ISTJ so I’m all introverted and junk. My mind is focusing on other things and usually it takes a few days to a week before I’m cognizant of the fact that I haven’t seen someone in a while. Look at me wanting someone to long for me, but not returning the favor.

I want you to be addicted** to me. All eyes this direction.

Update on some of the things I said I’d get accomplished:

  • This week has been difficult so I haven’t gotten to write many letters. I’m working on it, but my mind is just not cooperating. The plus is I’ve been journaling more.
  • Haven’t started editing Allison’s story. Printed out, red pen and highlighter ready, but haven’t started. Having issues with that.
  • I have three stories I need to have read asap. Once again, my mind isn’t cooperating so nothing is working.

So, in essence, I’ve accomplished a lot of nothing. I have written though! My other site is short story heaven and I’m enjoying that creative outlet immensely. Not a total lost cause, just not what I was hoping for at this point in the process.

My friend was offering his mini critique on my story. Editing with him is going to be fun, I can just feel it. Here’s hoping I don’t hate the story by the end.

Countdown to Spring Break: 9 days. I’ll have to work four days in a row and then I plan to veg until I’ve actually regrouped. Regrouping would be amazing right about now. So would a full night’s sleep, but you don’t see me getting that.

I can dream though, can’t I? ;)

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**Being addicted to C.C. carries the risk of being unable to leave her side, needing to hug her, hold her, and tell her that you love her. Extreme cases of C.C. addiction can lead to an inability to function without spending a few minutes in her presence. Withdrawal symptoms include shakes, tremors, dizziness, tears of sadness, and pouty lips. Take in at your own risk